The Worst Championship I Have Ever Seen

Where to begin. I can't even begin to describe how unimpressed I am with what I watched last night. In a game that was making experts and fans lick their chops, this debacle brought about as much excitement as an inner-city high school game. I feel like a girl who just watched her sexual partner finish within 15 seconds leaving me high and dry with a look on my face like "that was it?" This game, and for that matter this tournament, was overrated from the get go. The teams sucked, especially the two playing last night. Honestly, I could be getting an AquaMassage, at a Miami Heat basketball game, sitting next to Phil Hughes, while using a T-Mobile Sidekick that is streaming an episode of Two and a Half Men and a podcast comedy routine by Lewis Black and it STILL would not contain more overrated and underwhelming aspects then what I watched last night.

But that doesn't compare to the utter disappointment I had watching Butler collapse and UConn win a title after the easiest road to the Final Four ever. I mean I can come up with a million other times that I have been disappointed too. For instance, JaMarcus Russell's NFL career. When Nickelodeon cancelled Doug and Hey Arnold.  When Marc Anthony set up a fake kidnapping of Dakota Fanning in Man on Fire. When Gary Bertier got paralyzed after his car accident in Remember the Titans. Michael Mann's film portrayal of Public Enemies. Vinny Chase's drug addiction in Entourage. Hank Moody being convicted of statutory rape in Californication. The series finales of both The Sopranos and Lost. When Marshall Erickson took that job at Goliath National Bank in How I Met Your Mother. The accent of the girl from The Departed. And when Sir Michael Caine spoiled the ambiguous ending of Inception. But NONE of these compare to the 2011 Men's National Basketball Championship, and I'm not sure any championship ever will.

PS. Try to stop me on these pop cultural references.